The Darkness Beneath Page 2

  ‘Eighty-six, eighty-five, eight-four…’

  She sat like that for close to ten minutes, until the attack passed, aware that she had missed her ferry, just relieved the street remained empty. Defeated and physically drained, she got into the car, fired up the engine. Michael and Newt were out of town and not back until the weekend. She wished she’d asked for a spare key, instead of insisting she would go straight to the house. Suck it up, O’Connor. This is just for one night. Before Caleb she had been happy and confident, embracing each new opportunity, wanting to experience life to the fullest. He had taken those things from her and she had let him. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You did it, you left him, and you will get your life back.

  As she drove Nell re-evaluated her mental check list. The bank was now off the list, so were the groceries. She would call her realtor from the ferry. Chances were they too would be closed by the time she arrived on the island, so she would make arrangements for the key to be left at the house. It was all going to be work out.

  Caleb, Chicago, it was all behind her. Purity Island was her past and her fresh start all rolled into one. It was time to regroup and start over. You can do this.

  *

  There had been rumors she was coming back to the island, so it shouldn’t have shocked him when he saw her in the driveway struggling to get an oversized suitcase out of the trunk of a beat up Ford. He slowed his car, took a moment to study her, as she thumped the case down on the driveway and slammed the trunk shut. She was dressed simply in a dark sweater and jeans that hugged her long slim legs, blond ringlets escaping from her ponytail. He’d heard she was an artist, something of a big deal, but nothing about her screamed money. Certainly not the car she was driving or the way she was dressed.

  He watched her drag her luggage up the driveway, rummage around under a plant pot for the key that had been left for her. And then she was stepping inside the dark house, out of his sight, leaving him with an unsettled feeling. Her return brought up too many questions and although he tried to reassure himself everything would be okay, things were now out of his hands, and it bothered him.

  It’s going to be okay. Let sleeping dogs lie. She’s none the wiser.

  The past was the past and Nell O’Connor’s return wouldn’t disturb anything. But he would keep a close eye on her, just to be sure.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Despite being exhausted, Nell barely slept. It didn’t help that her stomach kept growling with hunger and, although she had wolfed down half a melted candy bar she’d found in the side pocket of her suitcase, it did little to abate the cravings for food. Luckily she had contacted the utility companies ahead of her arrival, so at least she had running water and electricity. After a long shower and a glass of tap water she’d flopped onto the bed in what had once been her room, hoping for sleep. It came in fits and starts, the musty odor of the bedlinen, which hadn’t been aired in a while, clogging her nostrils, while dreams of the past and the present collided uncomfortably. Finally she drifted off a couple of hours before sunrise, awaking to the sound of birds twittering and beams of light cutting across the bedroom walls. Although she wanted nothing more than to roll over and go back to sleep, she forced herself up, knowing that wasn’t an option. Today she was going to be busy, there was no time for self-pity. She showered again, dressed quickly and checked her cellphone, annoyed at the flutter of fear in her belly when she spotted the missed calls and texts.

  Caleb.

  She had known he wouldn’t give up quietly and he had threatened her on enough occasions with what would happen if she ever tried to leave him. She left the phone on silent and slipped it into her purse. First stop was the bank, then she would treat herself to breakfast. Her empty belly was screaming for food and a good cup of coffee.

  As she made her way over to the Sizzling Griddle, her mouth was watering at the thought of eggs and bacon. She had spotted the place when parking up outside the bank, standing where one of the old convenience stores had once been.

  ‘Nell O’Connor! Is that you?’

  Nell recognized Antonia Richardson as she darted out from behind the counter of the diner to greet her. Her old friend had a few extra lines on her face and her once-naturally brunette hair had been highlighted to ash blond, but otherwise she hadn’t changed a bit.

  ‘My God, it is you! I heard you may be moving to Purity. How the devil are you?’

  ‘It’s good to see you, Antonia.’ Nell took a self-conscious step back when the woman went to embrace her, but it went unnoticed as Antonia grabbed her in a bear hug. She glanced around the diner. Half a dozen booths were occupied and a couple of the occupants were watching in interest, but most continued with their morning conversation.

  ‘When did you arrive on the island?’

  ‘Late last night,’ Nell told her, freeing herself from the other woman’s arms.

  ‘I was so sorry about your Aunt Bella and Clarke. It was a shock to us all.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  ‘She’d be pleased knowing you were back.’

  ‘I hope so. How are you doing?’

  A loaded question, given Antonia had always had verbal diarrhea, but it was polite to ask and Nell was keen to change the subject. The pair of them had been gone to school together until Nell and her mother had moved away, but they’d kept in touch and hung out during the summers Nell spent with Bella. She nodded and smiled as her old friend updated her on her marriage and divorce, telling her she now owned the diner. The smell of food wafting through from the kitchen was almost too much and as Antonia paused for breath, Nell’s belly made an embarrassing grumble. She smiled apologetically. ‘Sorry, I haven’t eaten since yesterday morning.’

  ‘Oh, you poor thing!’

  Antonia ushered her to a table, before disappearing; she returned moments later with a pot of coffee, and a notepad to take Nell’s order. Nell quickly scanned the menu. ‘I’ll have eggs over easy, bacon, hash browns and toast please. Oh, and a side of pancakes with maple syrup.’ It was greedy, but she didn’t care.

  Antonia gave her a wide smile. ‘Coming right up.’

  Alone with her thoughts, Nell poured cream into her coffee and took a sip. It was the first cup she’d had in over twenty-four hours and it hit the spot. The old-fashioned bell above the door rang as it opened inwards and she briefly glanced up at the broad-shouldered, dark-haired man who had his back to her, recognizing the Purity Island Police Department navy blazer. She took another sip of coffee and, disinterested, closed her eyes.

  ‘Morning, Chief. You want your coffee to go this morning?’ Antonia shouted through from the kitchen.

  ‘Thanks, Antonia, and fix a cup for Tommy too. He had a busy night.’

  ‘Coming right up.’

  Something in the man’s tone sounded familiar. Nell cocked open an eye, could see him, back still to her, making small talk with a couple of patrons who sat near the door. As Antonia came through from the kitchen he turned, affording Nell a side view of his profile: his slightly hooked nose, wavy dark brown hair and stubbled jaw. Her heart went into her mouth as she recognized him as the bar owner who had caused her to miss her ferry. Except he wasn’t a bar owner apparently; he was the goddamn chief of police.

  Anger bubbled, quickly washed down with embarrassment, as she recalled the encounter. Now, in the cold light of day when she was thinking rationally, she could see she had been clearly in the wrong. He was still an asshole but, she guessed, she had behaved like one too. Feeling contrite, Nell picked up the menu and slipped down in her seat, hoping he wouldn’t notice her. She listened to him talking for another couple of minutes, thanking Antonia for the coffee. She peeked over the menu as he turned to go, accidentally making eye contact with him as he glanced in her direction. The corners of his lips curved as he recognized her.

  ‘I see you made the ferry okay.’

  Nell felt her cheeks flame. ‘Yes, I did… Eventually.’ She forced the words out, wanting the ground to swallow her up.

  Just
go. Please.

  He nodded, amused by her obvious embarrassment, and studied her for a moment, his green eyes intent. She thought he was going to say something else, maybe lecture her for driving down a private road, but instead his grin widened before his attention turned elsewhere. Nell watched from behind her menu as he bid farewell to the customers he’d been talking to and left the diner.

  ‘Isn’t he a sweetheart?’ Antonia swooned, as she arrived with Nell’s food. She set down the plates and poured Nell fresh coffee. ‘We lucked out when he decided to move to the island.’

  He was a mainlander. That figured. ‘What happened to Chief Bristow?’ Nell asked, trying her best to sound disinterested as she busied herself unfolding her napkin and shaking salt onto her eggs.

  ‘Oh, he retired about six years back. Chief Cutler transferred over from Portland. I think he enjoys the island life.’

  ‘That so?’ Nell speared a piece of bacon with her fork. Her encounter with the police chief had put a brief dent in her appetite, but now the food was in front of her she remembered she was ravenous. ‘Shame, I always liked Chief Bristow.’

  She finished her breakfast in relative peace, Antonia having other customers to attend. Her belly full and her brain more alert following three cups of coffee, Nell tipped generously and made her way across to the island’s main grocery store, where she stocked up on supplies, before heading back to Aunt Bella’s house. She supposed she should stop referring to it as Aunt Bella’s, as technically it was now hers. Bella had passed away from a stroke at the start of the year followed by her only child, and Nell’s cousin, Clarke, who died weeks later in a tragic accident. Guilt crept in knowing she hadn’t made it back for either of their funerals. After she moved from Purity, she had returned every summer to stay with Bella. She should have come home for them. Of course it was easy to say that, now she had left Caleb. In truth, he hadn’t given her a choice and deep down she knew Bella’s death had been the catalyst for leaving him: the point where revulsion for the woman she had let herself become overtook fear of the consequences.

  *

  Monday started the same as any other day.

  She generally rose before Caleb, keen to be out of the bed they shared before he awoke. Their house ran on routine, with Caleb liking everything to be a specific way, while Nell functioned like a robot, trying to ensure the whole thing ran as smoothly as possible so she could get him to work and out of the way. Today, it was more important than ever that things went to plan.

  After he had left for the office, she was going to leave him.

  Everything was in place, she’d run through the details hundreds of times. All she needed to do was be patient, to be compliant, this one last time and she would be free. Finally. She walked on eggshells around him constantly, but this morning she was particularly jittery and when she heard him stir, get out of bed and turn on the shower, her heart almost leapt into her mouth.

  Pull yourself together, O’Connor. Act natural.

  Although she tried, focused her mind on mundane tasks, fixing his coffee just the way he liked, pouring out his OJ and scrambling eggs, her hands shook, her legs threatening to buckle under her. She drew a few deep breaths, setting out cutlery, ensuring each utensil was polished till it shined. All the time his plate was warming in the oven, because one thing Caleb would not tolerate was a cold plate. When he stepped into the kitchen she offered her cheek, her skin crawling at the touch of his lips, and forced a smile.

  ‘Did you sleep well?’ She forced herself to ask the question..

  ‘I think I’m coming down with a cold. My chest’s congested and I have a sore throat.’ Although he was wearing one of his work suits, he loosened his tie. ‘Think I have a temperature. Do you think I have a temperature?’ He grabbed her hand, pressed it to his head, bottom lip sneering as he stared at her. ‘Why are you shaking? You’re not about to have one of your dumb fits are you?’

  Nell swallowed hard. ‘I’m fine. I’m just cold. Do you want me to get you some Tylenol?’

  ‘I’m wondering if I should take the day off, stay home and get some rest.’

  Please God no, don’t do that! ‘Why don’t you have your coffee and something to eat? It might make you feel better.’

  He caught her wrist hard and sudden, eyes narrowing. ‘What, you trying to get rid of me?’

  Nell’s bowels knotted, her skin growing clammy. ‘Of course not, I just know we have your mother’s benefit tonight and how disappointed you’ll be if you’re too ill to go.’ Caleb stared at her for a moment – a long moment – before releasing her.

  ‘I suppose I should go in. It wouldn’t look good if I have to reschedule meetings and then I’m seen at the benefit.’ He picked up his coffee cup and sat down at the table as Nell busied herself finishing breakfast. ‘Wear the black lace dress, the one with the low back. And make sure you straighten your hair.’

  ‘Of course, Caleb.’

  He caught her hand, glanced disapprovingly at her gnawed nails. ‘Do you have a manicure today?’

  ‘Yes.’ It was a lie, but she needed him out of the house.

  ‘Good. Your nails are an embarrassment.’

  It was forty minutes later when she eventually got him out of the house. She waited impatiently, peering out of the upstairs window, watching until his car had turned out of the street. Her shoulders tense, her mouth dry, she moved quickly, getting her suitcase out of the cupboard and filling it with the things she planned to take.

  She had never told Caleb that she’d inherited her aunt’s house. He knew she had lived with her mom in a small town in Ohio, that her dad had left when she was young, but nothing of her life before. Purity was her sanctuary and in some small way she wondered if her decision to keep her early life private was self-conscious, that perhaps a small part of her had always known this day would eventually come. She had taken the call learning of her inheritance a couple of months after Bella and Clarke had passed, sitting on the news for days, knowing she should tell him, aware there would be terrible consequences if he ever found out that she had kept a secret from him. Her initial instinct had been to put the house on the market and, eventually, she had, aware the money from the sale would give her choices, would help if she ever managed to pluck up the courage to leave him. But as the weeks passed the idea of returning to Purity grew in its appeal and eventually she’d contacted the realtor and removed the house from sale. It took her two weeks of deliberating and plotting then a further week to pluck up the courage to call her brother and ask for his help. She opened an account with the island’s bank, squirreling money away until she had enough to fund her plan.

  Finally had come the task of picking a time to leave. That had been the hardest, and she had put it off for a couple of weeks, terrified Caleb would catch her in the act. Then Saturday night he had been in a randy mood, crawling on top of her as she feigned sleep. They didn’t have sex much these days and he had caught her off guard. As she tried to fake enjoyment, feeling sick as he thrust and grunted on top of her, Nell knew she couldn’t take this anymore. After he had collapsed into sleep beside her she had known: it was now or never.

  Her heavy case packed and waiting in the hallway she called a cab. While she waited for it to arrive, she went online and booked a one-way plane ticket to San Francisco, using a card she knew he had access to. Her old college roommate Rosie lived in California and she hoped he would assume that was where she had gone. Ready to leave, she watched anxiously out of the window for the cab, panic balling in the pit of her stomach when she saw a shiny red Porsche heading slowly up the street towards the house.

  Shit, shit, shit. He’s come home.

  She was shaking, but before she could think what to do, the car had passed; a dark-haired woman was at the wheel. Minutes later her cab pulled up on the sidewalk out front. Her shaking didn’t ease until the house disappeared from view, but even then her nerves were still shot, her shoulders tense. She asked the driver to drop her at a used car place on the outski
rts of the city, where she paid cash for the Ford. As she drove out of the lot, heading east, she drew a deep breath. This was her one shot, her one chance to get away. She just hoped to hell she could pull it off.

  *

  Bella’s guesthouse was situated on the clifftop, three-quarters of a mile from the center of town. It was smaller than the two hotels on the island, but had always been full over the summer months. In later years, as her aunt’s health had failed, the business had closed down and Nell felt a pang of nostalgia as she looked at the old house, awash with the September sun, its white timber framework in stark contrast against the cloudless blue sky. She hadn’t realized how much she had missed the place. There was no denying it was run down, with Bella unable to either carry out or afford the necessary repairs, so Nell knew her nostalgia was tinged with guilt. Her aunt had looked after her every summer – she should have been here to return the favor.

  Of course, Caleb hadn’t been the only one keeping her away from Purity. The place had changed for Nell the night her best friend had died. Lizzie had stepped in at the last minute to cover Nell’s babysitting gig at the Dolans’ house so Nell could hook up with Cory Spellman. There had been a break-in. Mr Dolan’s younger brother, Roy, had been somehow involved and was found dead at the scene; his accomplice had killed Lizzie and fled. Poor little Tommy had watched it happen, but had never been able to ID the murderer.

  It wasn’t Nell’s fault, but she still felt responsible. If she had babysat, Lizzie would still be here. There was no changing that and it was something she would have to live with for the rest of her life. She had never returned to Purity after that summer, but Lizzie’s death had left its mark on her and it was not long after that the panic attacks began. Her mother had sent her to a counsellor, a kindly woman who had taught her techniques to deal with them. After that first year they had started to ease, but it hadn’t taken long under Caleb’s control for them to exacerbate.